


Just Once More

by Kaiserkorresponds



Series: Obsessive Compulsive Archivist [1]
Category: The Magnus Archives (Podcast)
Genre: Angst, Anxiety Attacks, Author Projecting onto Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist Has a Bad Time, Mentioned Martin Blackwood, Mentioned Sasha James, Mentioned Tape Recorders (The Magnus Archives), Mentioned Tim Stoker (The Magnus Archives), Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder, Past Georgie Barker/Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist, The Magnus Archives Season 1
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-18
Updated: 2021-01-18
Packaged: 2021-03-16 05:15:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 404
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28825800
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kaiserkorresponds/pseuds/Kaiserkorresponds
Summary: The tape recorder was on. There was no need to flick the switch again. No sane rationale as to why it would need to be powered off, and then also powered back on again. It was repetitive. Pointless and illogical. Not worth it.Still, his finger had not budged from the power switch.--Jonathan Sims, and his struggle with obsessive compulsive disorder.
Series: Obsessive Compulsive Archivist [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2128494
Comments: 16
Kudos: 49





	Just Once More

Jon flicked it once.

The tiny, snapping click of the tape recorder switch echoed in the room, bouncing off the walls almost like laughter. 

Almost as if it had laughed at the itch in his brain. Like it was mocking the static that had built up deep within his chest. 

He exhaled forcefully. 

He only needed to do one more. To record just one more statement. 

And the tape recorder was on. There was no need to flick the switch again. No sane rationale as to why it would need to be powered off, and then also powered back on again. It was repetitive. Pointless and illogical. Not worth it. 

Still, his finger had not budged from the power switch. 

Jon clenched his teeth.

Just, once more.

His fingertips hovered over the edge of the switch. His willpower locked in a fierce battle against the endless catastrophes racing through his brain as they all clamored for his attention. 

In one breath, the raw panic of something happening to Georgie flashed across his vision. Her being hit by a careless driver. The impact of it knocking her flat, and her dark hair spilling out over the anxious plains of his thoughts as she laid motionless on the pavement. 

In the exhale, the tight, clenching fear of the archives collapsing. Burying him and his assistants within a deluge of decades old paper, and smothering them in a slow, painful death. 

Inhaling, the abrupt terror that he'd be mugged on the way home. Trapped in the crowd and his valuables snatched out from under him, never to be replaced again. 

Exhaling, the idea that maybe, by just the tiniest percentage of possibly, the flick would be the one to dislodge some strain of deadly germ that had stuck to his fingers, despite his vigorous cleansing, and save him from a gruesome, painful end. 

Abruptly, the tidal wave of obsession crashed back into himself. Into clenched teeth, and no relief. 

He inhaled sharply, and his fingertips trembled under the weight of the obsessions. 

The weight of the compulsions, as always, was heavier than the strength of his resistance. 

With raw, chapped fingertips, and the feeling of bubbling shame, he flicked the switch once more. 

And the echoing click laughed at him with such a mocking certainty, he wasn't even able to enjoy the tiny reprieve from the obsessions. 

Maybe just once more. 

It couldn't hurt to be certain.

**Author's Note:**

> This is a bit of a divergence from my typical fics, but plz feel free to let me know if it was enjoyable or not !!


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